To those who know me my biggest complaint is my health. I always tend to think: " If I only didn't have (You fill in the blank) I could do so much more, be a better person, etc. I am sure some of you out there that are reading this and nodding your head and thinking:" I do that too". PerhaPS I even made a few of you laugh because you recognized yourself.
Sadly enough we will never know if those ideas would be proven true as there are no cures for any of these ailments. There are medications that can help you cope with them, but hiding just below the surface is the health condition that is holding you back. I will be honest with you all I have quite a few, and you know what? that's okay.
Some people have only mental ailments, some just physical, and some such as myself have some of both. I can hear some of you gasping and saying: " did she really just say she had mental health problems?" The answer is YES! I know all about the stigma attached to mental health, and I don't care one bit about it because none of it's true. I am not crazy, and I am not some deranged lunatic who deserves to be locked up in a room with padded walls. If I had a cast on my arm you wouldn't say cruel things about me because I had no control over that happening in my life, and the same should be said of mental illness.
Did I ask to my brain to stop producing the chemical Serotonin? NO!,
Did I ask my brain to decide to go between two moods sometimes as fast as a light switch turning off and on? NO!, and Did I ask my brain to decide if it couldn't handle all the trauma itself and my body had endured for 27 years it was ok to give me Post Traumatic Stress Disorder? No! So then why do we refuse to talk about mental illness? It's not going to go away anytime soon,and sadly there are many people walking around with it and won't get the help they need because of the stigma society puts on the issue.
One in five Americans deals with mental illness. Society says suffers from, but I prefer deals with it because otherwise we put ourselves in to the victim mentality. Every day I wake up and I have to decide if I am going to take my medicine or not. Once a month I have to decide if I go talk to my counselor about how to manage my problems. I can choose to be free from the cruelty of society, or I can run and hide my head in the sand and never move forward because I am afraid of what people will think of me.
For the longest time I was told by my ex husband I didn't have anything wrong with me and that mental health was just hocus pocus. Then after we were separated, and eventually divorced I couldn't afford my medicine all the time. Finally, after getting married for the second time I am free to take medicine without ridicule or contempt, and it's affordable. Thanks Hubby.
The one thing besides how society looks down on or makes fun of people with mental illness that's worse if if you have a chronic health condition. As someone talking from experience I have found that when one of my mental issues spikes up so does the pain level in body. If the pain spikes first the mental issue will follow as well. Therefore, I am stuck in a vicious catch 22 until one, or both, run out of steam for awhile. While I never would've chosen to live this life I have found that at least there are some good points to it all which I will cover in my next blog entry.
Until next time God bless,
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